― India.Arie
In the words of the prolific India.Arie,
“There’s hope
It doesn't cost a thing to smile
You don't have to pay to laugh
You better thank God for that.
Stand up for your rights
Keep shining your light
And show the world your smile.”
At the beginning of each new year, humans have taken to setting resolutions and new goals that they wish to accomplish in the coming 364 days. As the year wears on, however, we often find that we have not accomplished all that we set out to achieve, at least not at the rate we expected. I think that over the last two years, it’s been more and more challenging to hold on to the optimism that each new year brings. For many of us, life feels harder; things seem more complicated now than ever.
It is true that with each passing year, living becomes more layered, more complex, and more nuanced. But no matter what issues we face, we always have a choice. We can choose hope. We can choose to look forward to the next day with optimism, gratitude and faith. I choose hope every day, even on the days when it feels easier not to.
I remember many people in my lineage who faced horrific circumstances, and could’ve given up or opted out of trying, but they didn’t. I am grateful that they did not because had they done so, I would not be here.
I choose hope because I think of women like our World Changer of the Month, Elizabeth Taylor, and how easy it would’ve been for her to give up after her husband, small child, mother and sister-in-law died. But she did not. She believed in the possibility of a brighter tomorrow. She chose hope.
So as we begin the year 2023, let’s remember that there is always hope. Let’s commit to choosing it every day.
We often don’t know what to do, but we don’t give up."
― St. Paul the Apostle
Life is tough sometimes. Sometimes the unexpected happens and it feels as if the earth has fallen from beneath our feet. When those “take your breath away moments” happen, they can be scary, anxiety-ridden and perplexing.They can cause us to call everything into question.
The “what if” has come to pass. What if all of the other “what ifs” come to pass? Then what?
I have had to face this question recently and my response to myself has been: we keep going.
Please understand that I do not mean to imply that what it will take to keep going will be easy or pretty or comfortable. It almost assuredly will not.
What I do mean to say is that while we give all respect to the gravity of the difficult moment in which we find ourselves, we must soldier on. Those moments, no matter how gritty, ugly, hard and gut-wrenching they may be, do not exist in vain. They do not exist to wreck us emotionally and leave us eternally in ruins.
They will pass, and we will be better.
The real tragedy would be if we refused to let our hardest moments make us stronger, wiser and more resilient.
If we make it through to the other side of the seemingly insurmountable trials that we thought we couldn't, imagine what else we can do.
― Zac Ochsenbine
I admit it. I am goal-oriented. I am ever-working toward achievement. I am focused sometimes to a fault. I am in good company as many people who are successful in rigorous environments are wired this way. And while it serves us well to be task-oriented, we must be intentional about not missing the moments in life that happen in between the big accomplishments.
The other day, one of my daughters asked me to help her with an art project. At the moment she asked me, I was feeling extremely overwhelmed. My “to do” list runneth over. I had some research I needed to do for work. I had an upcoming speaking engagement for which I still had not gathered my thoughts. I had two parent board meetings for my daughters’ respective schools for which I needed to prepare. I was behind in my team manager duties for my younger two daughters’ soccer teams. And I still wanted to get a workout in that day. I had too much going on. I didn’t have time to color.
As I fixed my mouth to say, “No,” something gave me pause: her face. Her expectant, hopeful face made me stop and think. I had prayed for motherhood and the prayer had been answered; and unlike many of my accomplishments, this blessing was not a box to be checked. Parenting was not a task that was accomplished once and for all at one finite moment in time. It was an ongoing, moment to moment, day by day endeavor.
Yes, my “to do” list was important, but my daughter was more important. I decided to focus on the opportunity that I had in that moment: to put the “to do” list on pause and turn my attention to my young daughter who would be overjoyed to spend an hour on a Saturday coloring with her mommy.
As I told my daughter that I would indeed color with her, a feeling of peace came over me. I knew I was making the right choice. I was choosing to enjoy life with my daughter. This was a precious, sweet moment in her childhood that we would both remember.
Life is precious and it is short. It is imperative that we do not forget to embrace each of life’s moments as we strive toward our goals.
I don’t want to look back on my life and feel like I missed a moment of it.
